One Shots and Drabbles (ABANDONED)
by andamatitana
Summary: A singular one shot in what was supposed to be a book of oserone-shbut since I've left the Supernatural fandom, I'm abandoning it


**Disclaimer: Supernatural and the song shown do not belong to me**

 **This takes place after Cass broke Sam's wall and was kinda a warmup before I write chapter 15 of FMD**

* * *

The radio was playing and I payed close attention because these were Sam's songs. Sam's _favourite_ songs to be exact. I couldn't be bothered changing the mixtape when I got in. The song playing I didn't reconigse but I could see why Sam liked this song so much because I was able to understand why Sam liked this song. I decided to repeat this song until I understood fully why he liked this song. Pulling off, I listened closely as the song restarted.

Everything I said I wouldn't do, I did  
Life just happens and it is what it is  
That's how I used to think as a kid  
But better learn to swim or you'll sink with the ship  
'Cause in a blink of a lid, you'll be twice your age  
And then till now is like night and day  
And that perfect life that you're fighting for  
Can be lost in a series of sliding doors  
Too proud to say that you need some help  
When you look In the mirror do you see yourself?  
See the way I was I couldn't stand it honestly  
'Cause the old me was tryna kill the man I wanna be  
And so life took me on the scenic route  
To reach deep inside and get the demons out  
Then turn that storm to vanilla in the summer sky  
Caterpillar to a butterfly

I must be going crazy  
I got blood across my face  
I've got tears that I can taste  
I swear this world is tryna break me  
'Cause the walls are closing in  
And my soul is wearin' thin  
But you should know that

I'm right here waiting  
When you're done, baby  
Had to tell myself I believe in you  
Had to tell myself I believe in you

Lord knows I been running from my dream  
But I keep trippin' when the devil's tugging on my sleeve  
And the game don't stop when the ball's in my hand  
But that party life will put a pause on my plans  
But we don't make our faith  
And mistakes are what shape you and make you great  
So to sum it all up into words  
I never win or lose, I only win or learn  
All the drugs and drink, I'm a victim of that  
You know what curiosity did to the cat  
We were looking for a high where we knew we'd never land  
But now that I'm a dad I'm tryna' be a better man  
And the music allowed us to give you something  
When it hits home it can stop a kid from jumpin'  
I was on the wrong path but I made a turn right  
Then I opened my eyes for the very first time, like

I must be going crazy  
I got blood across my face  
I've got tears that I can taste  
I swear this world is tryna break me  
'Cause the walls are closing in  
And my soul is wearin' thin  
But you should know that

I'm right here waiting  
When you're done, baby  
Had to tell myself I believe in you  
Had to tell myself I believe in you

It doesn't matter what god you worship  
'Cause here on earth, no body's perfect  
You wanna be the hero that saves the day  
But the truth is everybody makes mistakes  
So, when you're out her fallin' down  
And temptation is all around  
Put your good foot first and bust out the other side  
Just like a butterfly  
Livin' in a world where this binge is the norm, and  
Every night out was like till six in the morning  
But I should be kicking goals, my passion's musical  
So why the fuck am I back in this cubical?  
Shit, flying off rails  
Like a train wreck but I will not fail  
So tonight imam pack my bags  
And leave the old me behind and the past I've had, like

I must be going crazy  
I got blood across my face  
I've got tears that I can taste  
I swear this world is tryna break me  
'Cause the walls are closing in  
And my soul is wearin' thin  
But you should know that

I'm right here waiting  
When you're done, baby  
Had to tell myself I believe in you

The lyrics spoke the truth of his life. He was going crazy. Every day he was getting closer and closer to having a break. More often then not, we did end up with blood across our faces and sometimes I would wake up to hear him crying. And I swear the world was trying so hard to break him because his walls were closing in and his soul was wearing thin. As for the other verses? The devil was tugging on his sleeve and he's trying to do right by me and Cass. He was trying so hard to do right by us. I felt tears prickilimg at my eyes because dammit if I hadn't dragged Sammy back into the life then maybe this wouldn't have happened. He had a perfect life and I took him away from that. I decided to pull back onto the road and skipped this song because now I felt so guilty. I'll have to find out what this song was called because it might ease Sam a bit.

* * *

 **Okay! I know I'm working on like 5 stories or something bUt ShHhH. Anyway, this song is Believe ft. Mario by Bliss N Eso and just… if it doesn't fit for the boys after Cass broke Sam's wall and before he went into hospital then you can bloddy well shoot me. Heck it still applies nowadays for them. Anyway, I really like Bliss N Eso and soooooo many of their songs I see fitting into Supernatural So ExPeCt MoRe BlIsS n EsO iNsPiReD chApTeRs In LiKE aLl MY sToRiEs**


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